Joey Comeau was born in Edmonton, Alberta in the year 1980. When he was younger, his father had custody and so his mother kidnapped him. That was pretty exciting.

His mom was a punk rocker and a hairdresser and she liked to keep her children on the cutting edge of fashion. One of Joey's earliest memories is of a Christmas party for poor kids, where everyone got a present from Santa Claus. Joey got a Barbie from Santa because the guy had never seen a little boy with long hair. "There you go, Princess," Santa told him.

In elementary school, Joey used to pull the wire out of coil bound notebooks and slip it around the latch to unlock doors. He taught himself to pick locks using The MIT Guide To Picking Locks, which honestly isn't very good. You just need to go out and buy a cheap lock at a hardware store and practice and practice and practice.

Joey studied Linguistics in Halifax, Nova Scotia.